The following is the transcript of my troop deployment (i.e. ending rant) from episode 104 of my news podcast The Mind Killer. If you like it, please consider subscribing to the podcast
One of the biggest ironies of the debate about trans people is that most of the big controversies center around the idea that it’s getting more difficult to effectively discriminate against men. The stories that captivate our attention almost always involve trans women getting some benefit that’s supposed to be reserved for women. This is why JK Rowling is always getting into trouble. People think she hates trans people, but my girl’s just trying to hate men. She’s just not very good at it.
Now mind you, nobody wants to stop discriminating against men. Nobody is yelling at JK Rowling for her assumption that men are dangerous. We all agree that men are filthy, unpleasant, violent, and disgusting. Take prisons for instance. Why do we segregate prisons by gender? Because men are violent, of course. And if they’re going to be violent in prison, it’s much better that their victims be other men rather than women. Who cares what happens to men?
Same deal with bathrooms. Girls and women will be traumatized if they have to shit in the same room as men! Men are gross! Let other men deal with them. Also, woman-only bathrooms are necessary because women need a place to get away from men. Imagine what would happen if they couldn’t go out in public without being around men. They’d never leave the house!
So now that we’re all agreed that discrimination against men is right and proper, you can understand why trans women are causing problems. How are you supposed to effectively discriminate against men if any man can just say “I’m a woman” and get into women’s bathrooms, prisons, or book clubs? Of course men are dirty and smelly, but what about a trans woman who went through male puberty? Is she dirty and smelly like a man or fresh and fragrant like a woman? How long do you have to take HRT before you stop being violent and aggressive? If you wear women’s clothing, are you less unpleasant? Or do you also have to wear makeup?
These are the questions that need answering! Thankfully we have an army of gender studies majors working on them, so we should have answers soon. Until then, just try to do your best to discriminate against men in the classic ways.
